Dual....:-)
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
