I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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