Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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