If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
