So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Randomize
