Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Randomize
