people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize