You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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