just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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