Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
