..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
