More tranny stories later!
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Randomize
