why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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