You just made me feel so damn special
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
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