nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
If I die, sorry about rent.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
