i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Randomize
