i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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