I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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