I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Randomize
