There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I love black thongs
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
My liver just had a heart attack.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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