12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
