Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Randomize
