i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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