Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
Just cropdusted the office
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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