Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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