this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize
