who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
When are your genitals available?
Randomize