Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
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