Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Randomize
