"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
