playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I love having hate sex.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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