woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
