i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Randomize
