What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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