he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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