Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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