dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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