What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
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