I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
