After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
