How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
apparently the secret to your success is patron
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
