these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
