Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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