From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
