do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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