Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
