You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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