Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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