Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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