I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
babies were throwing up all over the place
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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